This too, shall pass

Been working on my lappy endlessly, tweaking my Sketchup model and photoshop-ing my presentation boards.
I've got bloodshot eyes, I nearly scared myself. Also, I won't be surprised if, by the time I'm done, the doctor tells me I'm permanently blind.
Been listening to Within Temptation all over again, while I'm working.
I love their songs, and that there's a story to each one. Also, her voice is O_O amazing.
I probably have to strangle myself in order to get close to the octave she usually sings in.
I know this because Yung tried singing it in my car the other day, and it sounded like he was being strangled.
Gah. I hate doing presentation boards. Apparently whatever arrangement I think is fine, is not fine to everyone else. After I finally print everything on Wednesday, I never want to see a computer ever again.
For a loooong while. I'm gonna hide my lappy somewhere deep in my closet.


Dad got me a 1TB external HD a while ago, so I've been downloading movies and TV series' endlessly :D
My semester will be over in 2 weeks and ohmyholycows, I can hardly believe I have a 6 months break!!
Okay, so the 6 months will be spent doing my internship, but I'm hoping I'll finally have the weekends to myself again, to do whatever I want. If I don't, I swear I'll injure someone. Brutally.
Its been 2 years of design design design, and seriously, enough is enough.
Ah crap, I just remembered, even if I'm doing internship, I still have 1 subject to take.
Furniture design for Minor T_T

Need to get started on my Jappy speech soon.
Missed class last week, and I hoped they would skip my turn, but apparently my sensei is determined to see me speak in front of the class, because she told Leena to tell me I'll be presenting on Tuesday aka tomorrow.
Great. Just great.

strange powers

First off, I'm not an overly religious person.
Sure, I believe in Heaven, Hell, karma, reincarnation.
Hey, even if those places are not where we're headed after we die, I still think the idea that they exist, makes us a better person right now. What goes around comes around, right? You don't want crap happening to you, you don't be crappy to other people.
My favorite one, Wiccan Rede -> "An Ye Harm None, Do What Ye Will"
And of course, I do believe in God. A God.
And I will say this once again (because He keeps amazing me), God does work in strange ways.

Because I haven't been sleeping lately, it has affected my eating habits. So I haven't been eating as much as I should, gastric problem coming back with vengeance. Halfway through Practice exam today, I suddenly felt like throwing up and my entire body was.... I don't know, whats more serious than shivering/trembling? Like, I could feel myself twitching and jerking in my seat like I was having a fit. That really scared me. I'm probably already at my limit of no sleep and no rest. I quickly wrapped up my exam and came home for a half hour nap before going back to college again. And there was this thought that flashed through my mind at that time, I said to myself "Is it really going to take death to get them to extend the dateline?"
And guess what?
Someone did.
Pass away, I mean.
The UCSI Chairman's father... so Monday, coincidentally our Review day, is declared a freaking HOLIDAY.
Because they can't shift all the review dates for other semesters, so ours has been extended to Wednesday submissions and review on Thursday.
Freaky, much?

A classmate mentioned that the 2 times we had an extension for Design was when something happened to me. Like, that incident in Malacca and now this. And Bryan said;
"See? God bless you."

Thank You. I am grateful, really.

screaming bloody murder

I don't want to complain, really. But I can't decide if I'm more stressed, frustrated or plain pissed.
Yesterday, my class found out our Design pin-up submission for the Internal Review is this coming Saturday morning. 3 days from now.
And we have final papers to sit for on Wednesday and Friday. And those subjects are not exactly a walk in the park (easy).
If we want to pin-up our works by Saturday, we have to print by Friday. Which is suicide.
I can't even decide if I should do my design, or study for my finals.
They are so merciless! And its bullshit about trying to train our time management for when we're working next time.
Because I'll tell you, when we're working, we won't be juggling 6 subjects, writing reports, doing presentations, and all that shit.
Even if I don't sleep for the next 3 days, which is exactly what I'm doing now, I really doubt I can finish everything plus study. Even if by some miracle I manage to finish it, its because I did a half-assed job just for the sake of submitting.
It's going to be really funny if I miss internal review for the 3rd semester in a row, because I just know I'm going to die a painful death.

This is what I need to do in the next 3 days.
1. The final Presentation boards (P1+P2),
2. A3 Size boards: 2 for Reflected Ceiling Plans and 1 for Must-Design Unit (choose Lobby Toilet/Multi-function Buffet Station)
3. A2 Portfolio (Hotel Lobby: Critique 1 +2; Business Club: Critique 1 +2, only the good and upgraded boards to be put in your portfolio),
4. Sketch book and
5. Model

I said "No no no!" to myself, but still, I did it again.

I don't want this week to end. Or I want the next week to come as slowly as possible.
Been busy with Research report and IA Practice presentation/report (due tomorrow), I haven't even touch my Design work. AT ALL. Starting to feel a mild panic coming on.. which will most probably manifest into a full-blown panic by the end of next week.
Still haven't started studying for finals next week.
It doesn't help that my partner for IA Practice has been MIA most of the time. He completely ignored my phone calls and texts for an entire week. In the end, I had to literally stalk him by going to the office early on Friday, sit and wait for him to show up to submit his draft report. Thats the only way I could get hold of him to discuss our presentation/report. I haven't even mention he's the one who knows the format of the report. I've just been doing everything blindly.
I totally understand his situation, really. I know he has a lot on his plate, dealing with stress from Design, re-dos for both projects, exams and everything. But shouldn't we first settle the more important things now, like the presentation and report submission tomorrow?!
I'm going crazy trying to juggle everything on my own.

Okay, enough negativity.
On a more positive note....... currently, I'm not seeing any. I just want to get this out of my way so I can concentrate on my exams and design.

When you see something from afar, you develop a fantasy. But when you see it up close, 9 times out of 10, you wish you hadn't.
-Wicker Park

Is this true?

In Jappy class yesterday, we were doing a topic on family resemblance. So there was this Q&A session, who do you resemble the most in your family? Which part? Face, body type, attitude? And when it was my turn, Kon sensei asked me, why are you so small (she emphasizes small by doing a downward hand motion), which of course, cracked everyone up. The thing that bothered me is, she didn't even use the words short (背が低い), she said small! (小さい).
Apparently, I was the only one who noticed the difference.

I got a new pair of high-cuts from parents. Surprisingly, my mom was very obliging when I pointed them out, I'm guessing she's just happy I finally want something other than books. This one's so awesome :D Now I want the pair of high-cuts in Onitsuka Tiger, I saw it when I was out with Chris last week. They're neon yellow, I can probably stop traffic with them. Save up! Save up!



Reading Dir en grey's Myspace blog.

We have a show in San Francisco today. As I was walking the streets around the venue I bumped into a sad looking dog leashed to a tree.
Why are you so sad?
Why are you so sad?
It saddens me that I don't understand why he is sad.

Shinya

Source: blogs.myspace.com/direngrey

Oh Shinya, you're so adorable.

あなたにあいたい！

I keep forgetting finals are here! (and holiday's around the corner)
So, I'm not studying, as I should be. I've been glued to the TV.
I've got 2 exams to sit for, one relatively hard (IMO), because everyone knows I can't do maths to save my life. Especially if it involves memorizing formulas (I used to make up parts of the formula I forget, for Add Maths).
The other was supposed to be easy, except my lecturer can't write proper questions in proper English to save his life. Example of one of his essay questions: Explain the functional of resume. --> what I thought when I read this; does he mean write about a 'functional resume' (there is such a thing), or the 'function of a resume'? There was a 50/50 chance of me being wrong, so I tried to ask him what he meant, and he told me I'm not supposed to ask him for answers. Brilliant. And this is just one question. Imagine an entire paper with similar bullshit. A friend failed the same mid-term paper because she (also) misunderstood another one of his essay questions. And he asked her "How can you get this wrong? Its so easy."
It would have been, if he actually wrote properly.
I have a cause to be worried about this. Especially since he said there won't be anymore MCQs, just essays all the way. I'm dead if I misread anything.

What's in a dream?

I had a... pleasant dream yesterday.
It was everything I wanted, and so so real that when I woke up, I was trying to figure out if it really did happen.
Even now, I can still remember everything that happened.
And I can't stop thinking about it.
You know how dreams usually fade the moment you wake, but this one didn't.

And it got me thinking about Inception. The whole another-world-in-a-dream concept.
I wonder.. when you dream about another person, would that person dream about you too? Would you share the dream with that person?
I imagine that in that world of dreams, there would be a lot of floating bubbles of subconsciousness(es). I say bubbles, because I imagine souls wandering when we're asleep. Ghost-like, but I won't go on cause I'm scaring myself.
And what happens is, your bubble happens to bump into another person's bubble, they merge and that causes you to dream about that person. Because they're in your subconsciousness.
Does that make sense?
I just thought it would be cool if this is real. If Inception is real.
Real, as in, dreams could be another world for people. A place where we could do all the things that we never would have dared to in the real world. Lord knows I would do a lot.
Or I could just do it anyway in the real world, if I grew some courage overnight.


"I did everything I could to be near you, with the hope that one day, you would notice me."
-Mad Men

Oh, the A7X box has finally arrived. Lyd and her sis went through such pains to get it from the customs, because (no surprise) our systems are really screwed up and the people.. well, they're lacking a lot in the brain department. Lyd's sis went first because they called her to come check the parcel. So she went during the weekend, and after checking, they refused to let her take it because they weren't open on weekends. Lyd had to return to the same place on a weekday, walked to a few different places to get it checked/signed /blah blah before she finally went home with it. I guess, well.. there are (quite a few) naked chicks in the magazine, so they weren't gonna let us off so easy. Plus, guys in tattoos and black clothes = black metal, in their puny minds. I was supposed to go with her, but then the VRay problem came up so she had to go on her own instead.

Its so awesome. There are 7 magazines (same content), each member gets their own cover, then the 6th one was an image A7X when they started, and the 7th an image of them now (minus The Rev). Started reading a while ago and its sad. I would be bawling, if I wasn't reading this in a corner of my parent's bedroom (this is the only place with air-cond).

Synyster Gates on how, before The Rev's death, he was suddenly all fired up, working his bum off on their new album. Like as if he wanted to give it his all before going;

Yeah, he f*cking planned it all, that crazy f*ck. Knew he was gonna be gone before 30. He told my Dad that he was f*cking out. He said "I know two things. I'm gonna be in a famous rock band and I'm gonna die before I'm 30." He told my Dad that at 15.

Zacky Vengeance on The Rev, a week before his passing;
So he left [my house] - it was f*cking pouring rain - he was as sober as a judge. He calls me 5 seconds after he left my house, hasn't even left my neighbourhood, and like "Hey dude, I left my jacket," his favorite jacket. "I left it on your coat rack." So, I'm like "Dude, just turn around, come grab it. You're like 3 seconds from my house." I'm running outside. He said "Nah nah, don't worry about it."
I'm like "I can bring it to you tomorrow." He's like "Ah, no, don't even worry about it." Its like he knew, cause I always loved that jacket and he knew that I always loved it. And there his favorite jacket is sitting on my coat rack right now. I haven't touched it.


"It wasn't just like losing a band member; it was losing a brother, losing a best friend, and like losing your f*cking spouse and it's like losing your dream, all in the same moment. Its something that most people will never be able to comprehend, just really the most absolute definition of devastation."
-Zacky Vengeance

Day was bad at first, then turned AWESOME

After a week of endless work, I discovered VRay refused to render my perspectives. And here I thought I would actually finish early for once. Went over to Lyd's place for help, still nothing. Spent 3 sleepless nights editing every setting, and still nothing! So I just used the images as they were (very fake looking), and tried to photoshop some 'lights' in to make it look more realistic. Didn't do a good job, I'll admit. Oh, and then I got conned printing the boards near my place. The woman charged me double of what I usually pay for in Cheras, and the worse thing is I can't say anything because I was desperate. After that, I went to college feeling so dead, with low expectations on the outcome of my final presentation.

I was so so wrong, its almost still unbelievable.
I think I might be the only person to wrap up my presentation in less than 3 minutes (we all get 5 minutes).
I only managed to say about 2 sentences worth of my concept, before I was interrupted and both the lecturers start a conversation about me, in front of me.
Ms Ida said "Actually, we know you can speak very well, I've been listening to you all this while, and I don't need to hear it now, so I'll just -" (This does not sound like a compliment -.-) And here I start thinking "Uh-oh.." (You know things are bad when they don't let you continue)
Then Ms Sii interrupted and said "Oh, then we'll let her speak for 5 whole minutes then -" (And here I go, 'thank you!!")
Ms Ida interrupts again with "Oh, if we let her, I'm sure she can go on until tomorrow.."
And here I thought "Oh crap, she's really not letting me go on, its really that bad?"
And then she continued;
"What you did is simple and direct. Its straight to the point and you did a brilliant job and I love it."
"I really loved what you did, and I think you managed to capture the essence of your client with your design."
"Frankly speaking, you don't even need to come next Monday because there's nothing to change in your design."
I don't think I was the only one who was shocked. I'm pretty sure Ms Sii just stared at her for a while too.
It was all I could do not to throw my arms around her in gratitude.
Of course, there were also comments on my work ethics. Again from Ms Ida.
"The thing I notice is that you love doing last minute work, but in the end, you still manage to work out something good, and that is a huge risk. Its a gamble, and I have to say you are really really lucky."

I'm not even sure if that's a compliment. The 'lucky' bit.
The thing is, I don't do last minute work. Honestly. I usually start out early, but I just have a really indecisive attitude. I can never decide on what I want to do, and I keep over-thinking everything, feeling like I should probably do something more than what I already have. And then, when the deadline looms ahead, I panic and only then do I finally settle on what I really want. If I could only be more decisive.
Went home feeling slightly awesome because I've never gotten comments like this before.
Your work gets picked on (and I say this in a good way) only when you're either the best, or the worst.
I'm definitely not the former, but usually I scrape through with enough points to not be the latter.
That leaves me with the average bunch.