2006-2011

Its been 5 years.

Not a very long time, is it?

I can still remember a lot of things about you.

I can still remember how you sit at the door, waiting for us to come.

I can still remember how you'd be content just to be in the same room with us, not even talking.. and watching us fight over the computer, you'd tell me to give in to my brothers.

I can still remember how angry I'd be with you, for taking their side every time and not mine.

I can still remember I missed your (final) birthday dinner because I had to work part-time.

I can still remember the last night.

It was a Saturday, wasn't it?

I just came home from my part time job, I said I'm tired and did not want to go over for dinner.

How I wished I did.

How I still wish I did.

I'd have the last night with you.

I can live with failure or disappointment..

but regret, I realise, is the hardest thing to live with.

And this is one that would follow me forever.